Home / Debates / Life and Style / Children should be seen and not heard

Children should be seen and not heard

Or would it better apply to their parents?

All the Yes points:

  1. Children in public have the potential to make your life that little bit harder
  2. The most ridiculously ageist idea concievable
  3. I agree!!

All the No points:

  1. HOWEVER, a child of2-10 years old cannot be blamed solely..
  2. It is a draconian idea that can stunt development
  3. What it really means!
  4. Listen

Children in public have the potential to make your life that little bit harder

Yes because…

All children, when not properly trained, can be a real thorn in your side. And that’s just when you’re sitting in a restaurant, riding on a train, or shopping in a centre. It’s true that babies cry, but this is natural, it excercises their lungs and vocal chords and therefore they can’t be blamed. But brats that appear to revel in running up and down shouting in public places can make life difficult.

No because…

We were all children once. We just have to put up with these annoyances just like everything else in life. Kids have rights to do things and be free. To some extent all kids are loud and obnoxious and they eventually, hopefully, grow out of it, but if this behavior continues and the child is still out of control. One must wonder is it the childs fault or the parents?

Actually, it is believed when we’re children we are disobedient to learn right from wrong and experience the meaning and understanding of responsibility. Some children who disobey learn quickly rigth from wrong, learning from mistakes and becoming a well behaved citizen; some children do not. It is all based upon how that child is raised up until they’re an adult, and what experiences they endure.

The most ridiculously ageist idea concievable

Yes because…

Children are pretty, they give off Oxy-tocin: a chemical that makes them likable. Seeing children is pleasant and makes people happy.

However, children should be told not to have public tantrums since that makes people unhappy, including the children themselves.

No because…

Well, beyond Logan’s Run, anyway. I remember when I was a kid, being told I should be seen and not heard made me want to be felt as well – in the face. And frankly, that sentiment hasn’t changed.

I agree!!

Yes because…

Children should be quiet in public, they may still be children but they have to learn at some stage in their lives; manners and social expectations. You don’t see adults being noisy, messy and down right horrible whenever you go. On public transport it’s inconsiderate to talk on your mobile and make everyone listen to your conversation with your friend, children need to learn to be quiet and respectful like everyone else.

No because…

Greetings fellow site mates. I am Professor Megan Leigh Johnston and I disagree that kids should be silent in public places. Some people really hate little ones but……. WE WERE ALL THEM ONCE! If i recall when i was a kid (40 years ago), I can remember my parents who have recently died, shouted and screamed and swore. On public transport kids should have fun. Kids are actually very polite. If you think about trains trams and buses, a lot of kids give up there comfy seats for the fellow elderly!
Kids should be listened to full stop

HOWEVER, a child of2-10 years old cannot be blamed solely..

No because…

…its after all the parents that are meant to teach them how to behave both privately and publicly; that must treat them well when they behave well, and punish them when they are out of turn. Swearing and screaming at a child is not the answer. Parents should be taught how to be parents before they teach their children how to be people.

My name is Tess Groody and I am a kid myself. You guys are selfish and senseless for blaming everything on kids. I have been exploring topics on this humblee site; Debatewise, and found alot of debates are based on kids and what a neuisense they are. I looked at the debate on the topic that children should not eat as much salt and sugar, and all the people who posted a comment were saying how kids are so obese these days. Have you looked at all the grown ups these days?! jeez. Seriously you guys.

I’m in a poof because of all you people out there you are disrespectful to us!!!!!!!!!!

Yes because…

Adults often have the stresses of the world on their shoulders, and the last thing they want is children screaming in their ears in public places (unless perhaps a park or a funfair/some children-only type place). I don’t blame children solely, in fact I largely blame the parents… if a child of mine was screaming in public, or tearing about the place giving everyone around us headaches and disturbing the peace, I would quietly take my child to one side and try to get them interested in something else. It’s mainly bad parenting that causes kids to run riot and annoy everyone! I don’t have kids, partly by choice, so why should I have to listen to other peoples making a racket when I go out!??

It is a draconian idea that can stunt development

No because…

‘Seen and not heard’ is a Victorian ideal based on the idea that quiet, obedient children are superior in some sense. However, we should not be teaching young human beings to be completely submissive and to not express opinions, otherwise they will grow up as gutless, unconfrontational and easily controlled. Leaders are not usually the quiet ones and if we continue to tell children to be “seen and not heard” all we are doing is crippling their ability to grow up and be successful people.

Yes because…

Alright I’ve read both sides and I agree with some and disagree with some but I will try to humbly agree with the statement and this is why.

Firstly I feel some are taking the saying to a extreme. This is not needed. I’m always being told how well my children behave in public simply because nobody but the people at my table or by my cart can hear them. They are still asking questions and being curious. They are still behaving like normal children but they are not disrupting the meals and shopping experiences of others. You can teach your children to speak there minds in a controlled intelligent way when they’re upset, as to avoid being gutless. Being seen and noticed and pleasing to the parents and the community does not mean raising spineless children, and when exactly did it become undesired to have polite soft spoken children around? Screaming yelling and other such behavior is frowned on when a fellow adult does it and if you raise your children to ignore these behaviors they will become loud poorly spoken grown ups. You can not get a steady job screaming and talking back to a future boss. You can’t have passing grades arguing loudly every time you dislike your work. The world we live in is built around conforming to a ideal. I may not fully agree with the ideal but I do believe that firstly we survive and then we debate the means. Humans did not survive in the times of cave men by screaming and flipping out every time they got excited or angry and as “civilized” people nor should we…

What it really means!

No because…

The phrase children should be see and not heard was set in the victorian times now its the exact opposite. I am a child who is writing a speech on the topic: Young people should be seen and heard. What some of you dont realise is what it actually means. Before children were not allowed to stand up and voice their opionion, what they said did not matter in society. Adults did not care what children said. The children did not get opportunities to stand and say a speech like i am participating in now. This is the real meaning.

I know this and remember i am only a child.

Yes because…

No! That’s not what it meant at all, it just meant that the children should mirror what their parents were. If their parents had taught them to be civilised and quiet and repect their elders and them then to go into polite company and be rude and interrupt etc…it doesn’t reflect well on the parents does it.

The statement just means that they should sit quietly until they were spoken to – that they were able to “voice their opinion” if they were asked. Of course their opinion was valued, its just they were taught that they shouldn’t feel their opinion was important over all others or that they had the right to interrupt etc…that’s all.

I am also a child, and I know this.


No because…

I am 15 years of age at the moment and though I am speaking for the negative in this instance, both sides have valid arguments. Kepp in mind here i am in high school and doing two university subjects, one in psychology and one in child psychology.

I watch my younger cousins today as they run around shopping centres, continuously ask for items and steadily get louder and louder as they are refused, the items. I watch as they scream at their mother, my aunt because they wont get what they want and I even see them hit each other and tease each other for no apparent reason, aslthough it might just be because the younger of the sisters is, well lets just say she takes after her mother. Children learn from their parents, my aunt yells and stomps around and glares when she doent get what she wants or when someone wont do what she wants, and her two daughters the younger one in paticullar copy this behavior to the point where i have had one of them come up and kick me because, i was looking after them when they wanted something. This is an example the affirmative should use, these are the kids that need to be told to shut up. But i have met many other kids in shopping centres who have been polite, courtious and reasonable. I was a very mature child when i was young, i was forced to mature quickly because of family circumstances but the point is if my mum would tell me to do something and i said no, the arguement either went two ways either she yelled or she persuded me to do it, when she told me to do something i wouldnt do it but when she asked and persuaded i would do it with out complaint, most young children are similar. If they are cowed into doing something they will have a tendency to push boundries and be rude unless commanded, these children quite often turn out to be delinquents and bullies in schools but also these are the ones that are most often misbehaving in shops. Children whos parents however distasteful many adults will find this, but children whos parents try to talk with them will have a tendency to push boundries, but they will know when they are going near the limit and back off like for example they will ask for something once and maybe ask again but they will know to stop there, these children generally turn out to be high acheiving students in school, then there are kids who walk all over their parents, these kids either misbehave silently or are very loud and rude. then their are abused or negleted kids, these kids generally are either overly polite or even worst such as the little kids who run around and bite people and beleive me it happens.

I have really not talked about the main topic so i apologise, but i was trying to give some insight into what modern child psychologists and myself have found through study and observation, but though i speak for the negative, thats only because there is not a grey area, kids who are told not to tlak in public are not menatlly healthy they can opften become, secluded and unsocial, but children that are given free run are well rude generally, this is based purely on sources that i have gathered for assignments, but children should be told to stick close to the parents but be allowed to speak within a reasonable margin of noise, but more to the point parents need to teach their kids this, if they can do that this out dated topic becomes redundant.

Yes because…

Notify of
oldest most voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
3 years ago


4 years ago

Children should be treated equally.my mum always said that to all parents who have more than two children

6 years ago

I disagree. I believe that children should be seen and heard. It just makes me mad whenever I hear about this. I am 15 and a teacher told me that I have a voice and I should use it. Children deserve to be listened to. It would also damage self esteem. Here is an example: a child is told at an early age that children should be seen and not heard. They might actually believe it and if they talk, they might get scolded. They would become shy and it would be really hard for them to be able to talk and have their voices to be heard. If you think about it, it is actually a type of discrimination. Adults would be allowed to talk and the child would think that it would not be ok. We need to be strong and have our voices heard.

10 years ago

To be told to be seen and not heard is a hateful thing to do to your child. However it will backfire. Our mother did this to us and we got even. We hate her as adults and won’t let her see our children. We see what a cold witch she really was. Kids, stand up for yourself and become strong adults.

Verified by MonsterInsights