Should Parents Marry for the Kids?
"The number of Americans who have children and live together without marrying has increased twelvefold since 1970," Sabrina Tavernise wrote in The New York Times recently, adding that "children now are more likely to have unmarried parents than divorced ones."
Is that cause for concern? Does marriage contribute to a stable environment, or is it simply a sign that a family was already stable?
Children benefit from their parents’ enduring and mutually supportive relationship
"Children benefit from their parents’ enduring and mutually supportive relationship, even if those parents are not married. It is less important that the parents are devoted to state-sanctioned marriage per se, than that they are dedicated to each other, so that they can best nurture their children." - Ralph Richard Banks is the Jackson Eli Reynolds Professor of Law at Stanford Law School and the author of the new book "Is Marriage for White People?: How the African American Marriage Decline Affects Everyone."
As the 'yes' argument states, it is more important that a child's parents are committed to each other in a mutually supportive relationship than that they are married. There are many reasons why people may not want to get married, that may have no effect on the extent to which they can care for their children and each other. Equally, marriage doesn't guarantee that a couple will be committed to each other.
It would be horrible for the children
If two people are not fit for each other, forcing them to be together is a bad idea. It'd lead down a stressful road that could end up in arguments, fights, yelling, screaming and possibly even a more physical act. This would be a horrible situation for the child. Not to mention that divorce would be right around the corner. Why make the child suffer through his or her parents divorce?
marriage isn't mandatory for parenting
In my opinion it doesn't matter if a child's parents are together or not as long as they are both taking care of their kid. In some cases pushing for marriage between two people that don't want it can result to being a confrontational, and unloving household. This can lead to neglecting the kid because your always unhappy or even result in the parents blaming the kids of "making them stay" with their father for them.
What do you think?